December 15, 2008 - The Re-Start

Hey there.

I weighed in this morning at a whopping 290.6. I expect to lose around 3 to 5 LBS my first week. I haven't did anything to begin the weight loss yet but I am going to get everything together for myself tonight so I can begin in the morning.

Hell I may even start tonight.

December 14, 2008 - Here We Go Again

I know it is the holidays and this is supposedly the WORST time to ever try to lose weight, but ... HERE I GO AGAIN.

I will do an official weigh in tomorrow and let you know what my new weight is. My overall goal is still the same. I want, or need, to lose 100 LBS total. My weight should be in the 286 to 289 range so once my journey is over I should be a lean mean 185-ish LBS.

That was my high school weight and I have gained muscle since then so I don't know how realistic it is. I will never know until I try.

I'm also going to set short term goals as well. My first goal is to get out of the 280s. I have been here for months. It is time to see new numbers on that scale.

Well, wish me luck. Time to get back on the wagon.

December 12, 2008 - Realization

Hello,

Man! I really slipped out of what I am trying to do. The pressure of work, family and everything, it got to me. I stopped trying to lose.

As you can tell, it has been a while since I wrote last. Actually, I thought I erased this blog. I'm glad I didn't. Because looking at it, it made me remember why I am here.

I'm actually setting at my job looking at the internet and trying to hurry up and type something before my boss gets off the phone. I haven't been to my blogger account since the last time I wrote something. I am so glad this blog is still here.

I have been OK. I have gained about 4 LBS. I had actually gotten down to 285 AGAIN but gained the weight back. I guess that is pretty good for being off the wagon for more than 2 months AND it being the holidays. I have been getting that feeling again. I need to shed this weight.

I am going to try and will myself to start getting up again and walking on the treadmill and lifting weights. I know that it is something I need to do but I always find an excuse not to. I will have to change.

We will try again, and again, and again until we get it right! Together we (me and whoever is reading this) can do anything!

Thanks.

Day 29 - October 6, 2008

Hello,

Sorry for the delay in my blog. Things have been crazy lately. I've been working on building a couple of websites and it is taking all of my free time. I work my regular job during the day and I build websites at night.

Last week the family came down with some kind of funk that my daughter brought home from daycare. I'm still trying to shake that off. The worse part about it is that while I'm sick, I eat without worrying about my diet. I weighed in this morning at 289 LBS. Back where I started.

I missed two workouts since I've been sick. I'm thinking about trying a weightloss supplement. I dropped 40 LBS in two months when I was 23 using Xenedryne and playing basketball 4 times a week. It is either going to be Xenedryne or Hydroxycut.

Well hopefully I can get back on the wagon and get this weight off of me.

Thanks for reading.

Day 16 - September 23, 2008

Hello.

Everything is still going good. I haven't lost anymore weight. I am trying to figure out what I am eating wrong. I'm still working out in the morning. I'm not going to let this get me down.

I am going to try and keep this blog as up to date as I can. I have a few websites to build at night so now I can't just focus on blogging. If anything crazty happens I will let you know.

This past week I actually gained 1 pound. :(

I'll fix it.

Day 14 - September 21, 2008

Don't worry I haven't fell off the wagon. I've just been really busy. All is going well. I'm still eating what I believe are the right foods and staying away from fast food and regular soda. I haven't had a beer in more than two weeks so that is good as well. I weigh in tomorrow so hopefully I'm down a few pounds.

Thanks for reading.

Day 11 - September 18, 2008

It's me again.

Today is the day I wanted to give up.

I got up this morning to do 30 minutes of cardio. I have been feeling kind of heavy the last few days so I weighed myself. I am the exact same weight I was 3 days ago. I know people say that losing 2 LBS a week is good but I don't have the patience. I am going to cut my entry short today so that i can really sit back and analyze what I'm doing and what I'm doing wrong. To me the body is like a combination lock and right now I'm trying to decipher the code.

I will let you know how it goes.

Thanks for reading.

Day 10 - September 17, 2008

I'm getting to where I don't want to do this anymore.

It's hard for me to roll out of bed in the morning. I know that I need to do this but I just don't want to anymore.

I did though and was able to finish my normal Wednesday routine. I made breakfast for my girls and today I added some fresh sliced tomato to the mix. It was a good change up.

I had my Diet Coke at work and for lunch I had the left over sausage, mushrooms, and broccolli from last night.

I wanted something a little different tonight to eat so I made Sloppy Joe's. No bread for me. We had green beans and scallions with cheese as well. It wasn't completely low carb becaus their were 15 carbs per serving but it only had 60 calories. I also had a glass of tea.

Now I'm here realising that my messages are getting shorter and shorter. I guess I need to find some things to write about. If you have any suggestions let me know.

Thanks for reading.

Day 9 - September 16, 2008

Hey there.

It is getting hard to get up in the morning. Ever since Saturday my muscles have been very sore. Now when the alarm clock goes off, I start to think about my sore muscles and reasons why I should just lay here in bed. This morning was no different. I did not want to get out of my bed. But I willed my way out again just like last Tuesday.

I was late again to get myself together so after I stretched I only had 15 minutes to do some cardio. Today I just took it lite. Like I said I am very sore and my body needed a lite day.

Afterward I got cleaned up and made breakfast. Yes, that's right, 2 eggs, 2 bologna, cheese and 2 cups of tea. Hey, I lost weight last week. Why change anything.

At work I had my morning Diet Coke and for lunch I had my salad with ham and everything else that I normally put in it.

Today for dinner I made minute steaks, smoked sausage, tomato salad, broccolli, and I also cut up some whole green onions to eat with the meal. The green onions give my girlfriend and I horrid breathe but hey, were in for the night.

I went to the store after work today and found this organic sharp chedder. It was the best cheese I do believe I have ever had. I can't remember the name off hand but next time we eat some I will let you know.

And now here I am blogging about my day and still a little sore. I think that the lightness of the walk today will help me for tomorrow.

Thanks for reading.

Pics From This Weekend

Here we are at the beach






This is my girlfriend and my daughter. See, even fat guys can get hot chicks!







As you can tell I have a little bit of a weight problem.




Sunday at the park






And at another beach.

Day 8 - September 15, 2008

Hello.

Today I weighed in at 285 LBS! That is 4 LBS lost from last week! That's pretty good.

Today, it was hard getting up. I think that the sleeping in on the weekend took affect on me. I felt like I couldn't do it. The good thing is I forced myself.

First I weighed in. That gave my some motivation. Then I stretched and hit the treadmill for 30 minutes burning 310 calories. I found out that if you jog for 1 minute you can burn ten more calories than if you were just walking. I'm also trying to build up my lung strength.

Afterwards I jumped on the weights and did my normal workout of chest, shoulders, and triceps. I am going to add legs in once I get down to around 250 LBS. Right now my legs are too big to use the machine.

I made our usual breakfast this morning. Nothing fancy, nothing special. I had two glasses of tea. Some people drink coffee, I drink tea.

At work I had my normal Diet Coke.

For lunch I had tuna over a bed of greens with Ranch, cheese, pickles, and bacos. Or you can say I had my normal salad.

Today I had my 100 calorie yogurt at 2:00. They had a flavor called Boston Cream Pie. I could not wait to try it. It was fantastis. It had a pancakey - syrupy flavor to it. It felt like I was cheating but I wasn't. I guess that helped alot.

Today for dinner we ate at my mother's house. She made a roast. She knows that I am on my diet so she only made stuff that I can eat. Except for the mac-n-cheese which I stayed away from.

So I had roast and cabbage, broccolli, and corn on the cob. Yes, I had corn on the cob yesterday but I can eat that stuff all day everyday. It was great and mom if you're reading this, thanks.

So here I am now, typing and feeling pretty good about myself. I'm going to go and hold my daughter till she goes to sleep and hope that tomorrow is another productive day.


Thanks for reading.

Week 1 Recap

Hello.

I think that the first week went well. I had my ups and downs but I was able to battle through and hopefully it will get easier.

I'm still hoping that more people can visit me because I like to talk. I'm here for support if anyone needs me.

If your wondering about day 7, I take Sunday's off to spend time with the family. I don't do anything except be with my girls.

I ate good on Sunday. I had my normal breakfast, hot dogs with chili and no bread for lunch, and for my cheat meal of the week I had pork fajitas with sauteed green peppers and onions with corn on the cob.

I am cutting this entry short because I am at work. I will resume my normal entries tonight after dinner.

Thanks.

Day 6 - September 13, 2008

Today was a great day.

I caught up on my rest this morning. Usually on the weekends I get up at 5:00 am to get some work done while my girls are sleeping but today I decided that I needed the sleep and the work could wait. I slept until 7:30. It felt great.

My 2 year old was ready for milk as soon as I got up so I hurried and made her milk, grabbed her from the bed and layed her in the living room on a palette with CMT playing like we do every morning. While she drank her milk I cleaned the kitchen so that I could start making breakfast.

I made our normal breakfast this morning. Today just felt like it was going to be a great day. So I got a wild hair and decided to go to the beach. So I packed a cooler with a couple of sandwiches for my girls, some drinks, and some water. The only thing I forgot was something for me to eat. I delt with it.

We got to the beach and had a blast. My daughter finally walked in the sand by herself (normally she don't like the way the sand feels on her feet) and she, from out of no where, decided she wasn't afraid of the water anymore. I have pictures that I will put up. I had a Diet Coke while I was there and I did a lot of sunning and swimming. It felt great.

We stayed almost 2 hours and it was getting close to the little one's bedtime so we packed it up and headed home.

When we got home I decided to wash my truck while the babe took her nap. Then I helped washing the rest of my girlfriends car. Just burning up the calories today with simple tasks.

After we finished and got cleaned up, I made myself some tuna with one scoop of mayo, chopped onino, diced pickle, bacos, real cheese, spicy brown mustard, and garlic of course. I couldn't eat it all which surprised me. By this time I was on my second glass of tea.

I decided to do some work. So my girlfriend took a nap and I worked for a few hours. On the weekends I do Web Design and Search Engine Optimization along with a couple of other things. Anyway I can make some money, I try and learn it.

After the baby woke up we headed to our favorite place in the whole wide world. Wal-Mart! I was just kidding.

We had to grab a few things but we still ended up being there for almost an hour and a half!

By the time we got out of there it was almost 7:00 pm so I decided it was to late to cook. So I swung the car into Burger King. Now with my type of diet you are allowed one day to cheat. It has been explained to me that one day will help calm your cravings and it keeps your body fueled and burning weight. So I had it in my mindset that I was going to have a high calorie, high carb, high fat meal.

I rolled up to the drive thrue and it all looked good. All the pictures of the big giant burgers, milk shakes, cheesy tots, french fries, I mean just everything a fat boy could want. When I ordered, my girlfriend got the Fish Sandwich Combo, I ordered a Whopper JR for my daughter with a side of Cheesy Tots, and for me, I ordered a BIG ... FAT ... Tender Grilled Chicken Salad with Ranch dressing. That is what came out of my mouth. I couldn't believe it. The hardest part was trying to find a low carb alternative on that menu. There was one, little tiny section that had salads.

I will tell you one thing, that chicken salad was awesome and the right choice. I improved it by adding some bacos and cottage cheese, of course.

After we ate, my girlfriend told me that she wished she would have gotten the salad as well. She felt over stuffed and and miserable. I remember that feeling. That feeling of guilt. That feeling of hating yourself because you really didn't want to eat it but you did anyway. Let me just say that I had one of those cheesy tots in my mouth , ready to bite, and I took it out. I don't want to feel that guilt and hate anymore. A lot of that guilt and hate is what lead me to eat more, and more. You know the mindset of "Well, I've already screwed it up. This can't be any worse". I don't want that feeling anymore.

So now I am setting here, blogging away, and feeling great about myself. I won another battle.

I will finish my "Who I am" posting within the next few days.

Thanks for reading.

Day 5 - September 12, 2008

The treadmill was hard this morning.

I woke up at 5:00 am with that same groggy / tired feeling I had on Tuesday. Everything came rushing into my head again. I was trying to find excuses not to get up.

But instead, I willed myself out of bed, got dressed, stumbled all the way to the room, and started my stretching routine. This really helps me wake up in the morning. It gives me time to reflect why I'm fixing to walk for 30 minutes and lift weights afterwards.

Once I got on my treadmill, I felt my legs wanting to give up. I was tired, actually I am now as well. But I kept going. I figured if I give up this morning, I'll give up another morning. And then any other morning. I can't risk failing again.

I finished my exercises, got cleaned up and made my usual breakfast. I had two glasses of tea as well.

At work I cracked a Diet Coke around 8:30. By lunchtime, I was ready to eat. This Low Carb lifestyle makes you hungry. The important thing is to eat the right things when your hungry.

Today I had basically the same salad as yesterday, minus the pickle. I added two scoops of the Pea Salad that I made yesterday. I finished it off with Ranch (if you have been following, you should be able to tell by now that I am a creature of habit throughout the week. Wait till tomorrow!). I also had a 16oz water to wash it all down.

I waited until 3 pm for my yogurt and protein shake. What I have noticed is when I drink the protein shakes, it feels easier to lift in the morning. The reason is because it is helping my muscles heal or recuperate quicker so that I can use them and lift again. I remember this from football in high school.

Today for dinner I decided to switch it up and eat at one of my favorite resturants. I figured now is as good as time as any to test my will. So we went to Sonny's Real Pit B-B-Que. Now I don't know if these resturants are everywhere, but they sure are good.

I knew exactly what I wanted. At Sonny's, there is a low carb option. It gives you a half pound of meat and the salad bar. This is right up my alley. So I order the Pulled Pork Low Carb meal. My girlfriend ordered the same except with white meat chicken and we ordered our 2 year old a grill cheese meal.

Well I wasn't thinking when I ordered my daughters food. When they brought it to the table it was LOADED with hot, mouth watering, easy to get off your diet, french fries. At first I didn't say anything to my girlfriend because she also had something I wanted. She had ordered the garlic bread as well. This garlic bread is awesome! It should be in the garlic bread hall of fame it is so good. And she had two pieces.

Now my girlfriend is all of about 125 LBS. She wasn't going to eat everything she ordered and I knew that. Actually, that was the first thing that I thought of when the food got to the table.

So I'm sitting there, looking down at my plate I got from the salad bar which consisted of fresh spinich, sweet pickles, real cheese, olives, cottage cheese, chicken salad, onions, and bacos. I kept eating trying not to look, or think, or smell all the goodness around me. I touched my daughters french fries 4 times, and didn't eat them. My girlfriend asked me if I wanted the other piece of bread, and I declined. And to finish the night off, I only went to the salad bar ONCE! I am ecstatic!

So now I'm here telling everyone and anyone that needs the support or are ready to give up. DON'T DO IT. YOU CAN BEAT THIS. IF YOU FALL OFF A LITTLE, GET RIGHT BACK UP AND KEEP GOING. YOU MAY LOSE SOME OF THE BATTLES, BUT YOU CAN WIN THE WAR.

I won my first battle tonight.

Thanks for reading.

Day 4 - September 11, 2008

Today actually started off great.

I didn't over sleep. I got right up, got dressed and was able to get my entire 30 minutes on the treadmill. I broke a good sweat.

I made my usual breakfast (2 eggs, real cheese, 2 bologna) and had a Diet Coke. I took the Diet Coke with me to work. Well I took it with me in the truck but it was gone by the time I got to work.

About 8:30 I cracked another Diet Coke like usual. I worked really hard last night and today trying to get as much traffic to this blog as I could. Every little extra second I had went in to trying to build this up. I hope something works.

For lunch I had a salad (as you can tell I love salads). My salad today had Iceberg Lettuce, Bacos, real shredded cheese, sliced pickle, and sliced ham. I finished it off with my Peppercorn Ranch. Delicious! I also had a 16oz water. While I was eating my salad, my coworker, the food bringer, came in. I was exstatic! He actually brought me some smoked ribs with no sauce because he knew I could eat them. There were (notice I am saying were) two small portions of ribs. They were excellent with my salad!

I waited till around 3:30 to eat my 100 calorie yogurt and drink my protein shake. It seems to curb my night time appetite better when I eat these later in the day.

After work I went home and threw a couple of Cube Steaks in the pan with garlic and Montreal Steak Seasoning. I coated the pan with Pam and started searing them up. I also made Pea Salad, French Style Green Beans, and Whole Grain Wheat Rice.

I had only a small scoop of the rice, one steak, two scoops of Pea Salad, and one scoop of Green Beans. I also cut up some block Sharp Chedder.

Just a few more days until I get to weigh in again. I think I am going to start taking pictures of the scale so you guys know I'm not fibbing. I am also going to try and get a camcorder and start filming some of what I do and some other stuff.

I appreciate you coming by and thanks for reading.

September 11, 2001 - 9/11/01 Where Were You?

I remember that day quite well.

I was working at a call center in Tampa Florida. I actually just arrived. I walked through the door and in to the call center area and I noticed that people were crowded around a couple of computers.

My supervisor looked up at me and said "Did you hear that a plane flew into the World Trade Center". I had not heard about it even though I was listening to the radio the whole way to work.

I shook my head and exclaimed " Wow, that sucks". The only thing I thought is that it was some freak accident. Maybe there was bad weather or something like that.

I hovered over my supervisor's shoulder as she watched the live feed via CNN.com. The site of the towers really didn't affect me at the time. I was just amazed that it had happened.

Well we went on about our business and started our day. During our morning meeting, Gene who is a retired Devil Dog (Marine) and also a supervisor interupted the meeting and told our boss that he needed to speak with him. They left the room and we went on about our business.

Now we were in a call center. We set appointments for a vacation club. So the calling began and we started getting very distressed people on the line. I remember specifically one women yelling at the top of her lungs "DON'T YOU REALISE WHAT IS GOING ON!?". Now the area of the calls we were making was Salt Lake City, Denver, Plano, and Omaha. Everyone that we spoke with was glued to there televisions.

Still having CNN.com up on a computer my supervisor was watching the screen when the second plane hit. She gasp "Oh my God!" and ran into the boss' office. The calling stopped. The room got silent as everyone from the desk PC tuned to CNN.com to see what was happening.

The smoke billowing from the buildings. The people running in caos. The flames. The live video of people jumping. I still see it. I'm sure you do too.

Next I heard footsteps and turned to see Gene. His brash and presidential type stance called our attention to the front of the room. He said "Today is a sad day in America. From what I take of what is going on, we have been attacked. They are using our aircraft's as weapons against us. What we need to do is stand tall as American's. Do not let this effect you. It is OK to be emotional. But do not let this break you. What we need to do now is go home and be with our families. Pray for the people of New York" and with a swift turn, he returned to his office.

I got in my car and this time when I turned on the radio, the tragedy was being talked about all over every station.

I got to my apartment and sat there and watch everything. The Pentagon, Pennsylvania, the towers falling. I see it still. And I was in Florida. I can't imagine the feelings of the people who survived or who were on the street watching.

I called my mother to make sure she was alright. My brother, my girlfriend, everyone I could think of. I remember sitting there and going over and over with myself of how this is going to change us. This is going to change America. This changed America.

I sat at home for the rest of the night watching the recap and waiting to see if anything else was going to happen.

Here is my political statement.

This is a tragedy that not only happened to New York, it happened to the entire free world. They stopped showing the pictures and video on the television because they said it just makes American's angry. YOU ARE DAMN RIGHT! We the people, did not start this war. We the people have the right to be angry if we please. The government has no right to tell us what we can watch, listen to, or say. We the people did not hate nor dislike these people, but these people are taught to hate us. They want to kill us. What I ask for, no I demand is retribution! We have the right to turn that desert into a parking lot. But instead we fight an oil war. Yeah we bombed Afganistan, but you didn't get the job done.

Now I understand why we invaded Iraq, actually there are two reasons that I believe. Sadam Hussein tried to kill George H.W. Bush when he was in office and the fact that we have "oil men" in the White House. George W. was playing the ol' west outlaw and giving Saddam a little payback. "You tried to kill my paw! and now I'm gonna kill you!" type of mindset. The weapons of mass destruction was a fabricated reason. It was for payback and to protect our source for oil.

But guess what? American's are still dying. We have brothers, sisters, fathers, sons, mothers, daughters, cousins, aunts, uncles, friends, neighbors, girlfriends, boyfriends, and countrymen dying everyday. And for what. WHY ARE WE STILL THERE?

This war has put a strain on our Armed Forces, a strain on our economy, and a strain on our lifes. We must find a way to win this war that we started and finish what they started.

Thanks for reading.

Who I am - Part One

This story?

I was born in Shelby, NC to a man named Earl and a woman named Patricia. I was their second child. I have a brother named Earl as well. I lived in Carolina until I was 2 years old and then relocated to my mother's home state of Florida.

As I got older I noticed things about our life and family. My father was an abusive alcoholic and my mother and brother was his whipping posts. Growing up I seen alot of fights, knives being pulled, faces being smashed, police being called.

My father was a little bit on the wild side. He too had a rough up bringing. He and his brothers were given away to an orphanage as pre-teens. That is where he learned to smoke and drink. Fighting was away to pass the time and your only means of survival.

Now that I'm older I can understand his hard life, but he didn't try to make it any better for us either.

Now in the midst of all of the fussing and fighting I was really the only one that he never messed with. Later he told me, when I was around 21, that the reason he never layed a hand on me is because he knew that I was his son. For the longest time he believed my brother to be someone elses son.

We lived as a poor family in the 80's. Sometimes my mother would cry because she couldn't pay the bills and my dad would lay out of work because he was drunk. He lost more jobs than he kept. He was an electrician by trade. He had jobs where he was making over $20.00 per hour, but he loved the bottle more.

My parents divorced which in some cases just made matters worse. Sometimes he would come and try to pick us up while drunk and they would fight again.

My mother, bless her forgiving and gullable heart, would take him back because she wanted us to have a father figure. And she was not having any other man around us other than dad.

So, as kids do, I got older. I seen numerous fist fights between my brother and my dad. Once my dad tried to stab Earl when I was 11 years old. Luckily my mother worked not to far from the house so I was able to get help. Not to long after that incident, when I was 13, my brother had a "make-shift" weapon that had nail like spikes. He drove it into my dad's arm because he pulled a knife again.

This is the kind of life I grew up around. Even though hardly any of it was directed at me, I still felt the anger and the hurt. It was always there.

When I was a child they always told me not to waste my food. "Eat what is on your plate". "There is plenty left why don't you get some more". Being a kid I did as I was told. I found comfort in food and the closed doors of my room. I could block everything out when I was in there. The greatest thing about it was, in my room is where I blossomed.

When I was twelve mom and dad bought me my first electric guitar for my birthday. It was candy apple red and came with a power amp. It was beautiful. My Aunt Lavada, whose husband at the time played guitar, bought me a Rickey Van Shelton music book. That same night I played my first song. Well as best as I could at least.

From there I kept playing music. When ever they were fighting, I was playing music. Whenever there was nothing to do, I was playing music. I remember one time mom and dad bought me a Nintendo (The first ever Nintendo). I played it for 3 days and told them to take it back because it was interfering with my music. Not only did I learn to play rhythm guitar, I also taught myself to write lyrics. Before they new it I was off and running with a book full of Country songs and a dream to make it in the music business.

I didn't realize at that time that I was overweight. At the age of 12, in 7th grade, I was 212 LBS and 5'6". I was almost as heavy as my dad and I was heavier than my adult brother. I found comfort in my room.

In between 8th and 9th grade is when I lost my weight the first time. We moved into a neighborhood where all the kids played basketball at a local court that was right down the street. We played full court games for hours. In the summertime we would meet down there and play until lunch time, leave to eat, and then come back and play until dark. We did this the entire summer.

When I got into high school I was 5'8" and 180 LBS. I was a lean, mean, basketball body machine.

I will finish my story in the next entry.

Thanks for reading.

Day 3 - September 10,2008

Hi there.

Well today in my weight loss journey was kind of uneventful.

I woke up this morning at 5:00 am. Today it wasn't hard for me to get going. I think it had something to do with my bad start yesterday. I got up, got dressed, stretched, and did 30 minutes on the treadmill. I was able to do my 300 calorie burn program today because I got up in time. WOOHOOO!

After the treadmill I lifted weights. I worked out the same muscle groups as on Monday. I did 3 sets of [whatever weight that is] for my chest, shoulders, and triceps. This machine will actually do more excersizes but this is all I have time for in the morning. I am going to invest in a curl bar because I like to curl.

I made breakfast with a twist this morning. I had the left over steak with sauteed green peppers and onions with my 2 eggs. I still had my real cheese in there (I love real cheese). I made my lunch and I was out the door. I also had a glass of tea with breakfast.

I had my Diet Coke this morning, like always.

At lunch I had basically the exact same water and salad I had yesterday, minus the olives. The reason, well, I forgot to pull out the ham out of the freezer. So that is 3 days in a row having tuna for lunch. I'm getting a little tired of it.

A coworker today brought me some Oreos when he came back from lunch. Now I love me some cookies but without a second thought I told him that "I appreciate it but I can't eat them". He kind of looked at me strange and gave them to the coworker that gave me the fried fish yesterday. So I say his waist line deserves it because he knows I'm trying to lose weight. I guess misery loves company.

At around 3:30 pm I was finally able to get to my 100 calorie yogurt and my protein shake. Today the yogurt was French Vanilla. It was awesome!

Once I got home I started pattying up some turkey burgers. This is a little something I got off of "The Biggest Loser". If you have never had a turkey burger, you don't know what your missing.

Here is my recipe for mouth-watering turkey burgers.

1. Put the ground turkey in a big bowl


2. Get out your pan and put it on a medium burner to start to get it hot.


3. Cover the turkey with garlic powder. Use the amount to your own taste. I personally love garlic so I try and cover the turkey pretty good.


4. Next do the same with fresh ground pepper. This gives it that little spice a good burger needs.


5. Add some seasoning salt. Not to much. It is salt and there is a ton of sodium.


6. Now mix all the spices and turkey together real good.


7. Your pan should be hot enough now so add a little bit of oil to the bottom of the pan. Just enough to coat the bottom with a thin layer.


8. Go ahead and patty your turkey burgers up and add them to the pan.


9. Fry them up until they are golden brown and done in the middle.

It's that easy!

Now the way you eat them so they are even better for you is simple. NO BREAD! I use romain or iceberg lettuce as a container for the turkey burger. I put a thin layer of mayo on one side of the lettuce. I add my real cheese, sliced onions, pickle, and mustard. Tonight I also added some Hormel "No Beans" chili into the mix.

Now once the burger is the way you want it you can either add another piece of lettuce as a top or sometimes the lettuce is big enough you can fold it over and then it becomes like a wrap. Either way, once you taste it you will think "where have I been". The best part about it is that you can get a pound of ground turkey for cheaper than a pound of ground beef. So it's cheaper and better for you.

I served this with canned corn.

And now I am sitting here. Drinking the rest of my tea from dinner and hoping that this blog reaches people who are like me or would like to just talk. As you can probably tell I am trying some different things out on the sides of the blog. I am trying to attract traffic with things like Adsense and a couple of other blog traffic "codes". I hope something works. If you need anything just give me a yell and I will be there.

Thanks for reading.

Day 2 - September 9, 2008

I kind of let myself down today.

Everything was good until lunch time. This morning the alarm clock went off at 5:20. I believe I layed in bed until 5:30. I wanted to get up to do some cardio on the treadmill. The day started off with me misjudging how long it takes me to get motivated, get my clothes on, and stretch so that I could get my workout in. After I finished and was ready to get on the treadmill, I only had 15 minutes until 6:00 am. The program that is on the treadmill burns 300 calories but it takes 30 minutes. So for 15 minutes I did a jog / walk. I tried to jog for as long as I could before I felt like my lungs were going to burst. Then I would slow it down so I could catch my breathe. This was not my ideal way to workout but it made me break a sweat and I burned over 100 calories.

After getting cleaned up I made the normal breakfast for my girls and me. I had my 2 eggs, 2 pieces of bologna, but this time I added a table spoon of mayo for taste. One of my weaknesses is mayo. The thing about mayo is there are little to no carbs, its just LOADED with empty calories so you have to watch out how much you eat. I also had a glass of tea.

When I got to work I had my normal morning Diet Coke. Now I may be wrong but I do believe that no one has proven yet that diet soda is bad for you, right?

At lunch, today I brought a salad. I love salads! In my salad today I used

• Iceberg Lettuce


• Olives


• Bacos


• Real Shredded Chedder


• Sliced Pickle


• Tuna

and to top it off I used an awesome Peppercorn Ranch Dressing. It was fab!

I know your probably looking at that salad and thinking "this salad is not healthy" but it is high in protein and low in carbs so it is right up my alley.

I also had a water to wash everything down.

Now the problem that I had was right before lunch a co-worker, for whom I can say cooks well and used to always bring me goodies, brought me in some deep fried Red Snapper and hush puppies. Man oh man I almost was not able to contain myself. I wanted them so bad because just last week he brought me some in and they were SO GOOD!

I could taste that hannd dipped batter. It was calling out to me. My mind started coming up with suggestions on ways to justify my eating every piece. Luckily it was wrapped in tin foil so I wrapped it up and stuft it in my lunch box. He also offered chicken and yellow rice. Thank goodness that he offered after I ate my salad so I was already full.

Now that may little episode probably wouldn't effect most people, but it messes with my head. I start to worry if I'm going to be able to continue. Hell, it's only the second day. I worry.

At 3:00 pm I have my 100 calorie yogurt and today, just for extra protein, I have a protein shake. I actually love protein shakes. When I was in my teens and lifting weights, protein was the "thing". I guess its a lot better than steroids.

After I left work I was still trying to justify having that fried "A-Bomb" in my lunch box. Your probably thinking "why didn't you throw it away"? I was taught as a child never to throw food away. Eat what you are given unless your not hungry. If your not hungry, give it to someone else. So I did.

My mother is on a fixed income and I know how much she loves fried fish and hush puppies. She probably needed a little company too so I took it to her and stayed with her for a little while shooting the breeze.

When I got home I prepared a meal for my girls and I. I cut up a green pepper, a yellow onion, and a top round steak. I julienned each item and mixed it in a frying pan coated with olive oil spray. I added garlic powder, and Montreal Steak Seasoning to give it that extra little kick.

As a side dish I boiled some brocolli florets and warmed up the left over baked beans from last night.

Now here is where I ran into my problem.

I made our plates like I always do. Sat down and everything was fine. The food was good, we talked, everything was fine. After I finished, I suddenly got the urge for mayonaise. So unconsciously I went to the fridge, broke out the mayo and proceeded to dip 1/4 table spoons out of the jar onto the meat and veggies that were in the pan.

Once I realised what I was doing there was only a little of the meat and veggies left.Enough for probably one serving. So I ate an extra serving to go along with my regular dinner serving.

I am so disappointed. I want this so bad. I've had this problem before. That is why all of my other diets have failed. Sometimes I eat and don't realise how much I'm taking in.

This has dampened my spirits a little bit but I am not going to let it kill me. Writing about this has actually been good therepy. There is always tomorrow and I will not give up.

Thanks for reading.

Day 1 - Monday September 8, 2008

I woke up this morning at 5 am. I was kind of excited all night because I can't wait to get this wait off of my chest, and back, and legs, well you get my drift.

When I weighed myself this morning I weighed in at 289 LBS. Now take into account that I am only 5'9" tall so 289 LBS is a lot of weight for a short guy.

From the scale I headed into exercise. I am lucky enough to have a little bit of exercise equipment at my house in a spare room. I have a treadmill and an All-In-One weight set that only a couple of the exercises work.

This morning I walked 30 minutes on the treadmill. I used this time to search my head and to figure my next move. That is how I came up with this blog idea. During which I burned 300 calories, or at least thats what the machine said.

After the treadmill I lifted some weights. Throughout my life I have always heard that lifting weights, watching what you eat, and cardio is the keys to losing weight. I couldn't tell you if that is true or not. I haven't been thin since 2000 (I will tell you this story later).

As for my weights, I don't know how much weight I was lifting because the weights didn't come marked and there is some kind of resistance formula and all that kind of stuff. All I know is that it was heavy enough for me to rip the muscles but not kill myself.

I worked out my chest, shoulders, and triceps. The magic number when I was in high school was 3 sets of ten. I stick with that philosophy.

This morning at about 10 minutes till 7 am I made breakfast for my girls. I ate 2 scrampled eggs with shredded cheese and 2 peices of fried bologna.

I know what your thinking. Cheese, egg yolks, bologna? My goodness he is going to give himself a coronary.

I view this food a little different than most people see it.

The eggs are a great source of protein. Yeah the yolk is where all the cholesterol is but I don't have time in the morning to fight with an egg yolk. The cheese is also another cholesterol counter but I only use real cheese. Cheese is also a great source of protein. Both the cheese and the eggs have few if any carbs. The bologna on the other hand has only two grams of carbs and 4 grams of protein per slice. The carbs help my body get going and burning calories in the morning. I also had a 16oz water and 2 glass of tea sweetened by Sweet 'n' Low.

At about 8:30, while at work I had a Diet Coke. I work as a sales person, behind a desk all day so there is no burning calories.

At 11:00 I eat my lunch. I usually always take my lunch with me because anywhere I go to eat, all I want is the stuff that is going to keep this semi-truck tire around my waste.

Today I had 2 cans of tuna with one spoonful of regular mayonaise, some spicy brown mustard, garlic powder, and olives. Next time I will do without the olives because of the sodium. It was good and easy. The problem that I had was that I still felt hungry after I ate. I found out that if you start doing something else that your body will stop feeling hungry. I started working on this blog during my lunch hour and before I knew it I felt quite full. I guess the food needs time to expand. I also had a 16oz water with my lunch.

At 2:30 I had a 100 calorie yogurt. It was Lemon Meringue and very tasty. After I finished I had another water. The water and the yogurt together made me feel full and it also curbed my sweet tooth with a "better for you than chocolate" alternative.

When I got home I cooked boneless porkchops (I will put up some of these recipes because I've been told I was a good cook), seasoned pan seared mushrooms, french style green beans, and baked beans. I had only one plate, one scoop of each, and only one pork chop. I used to try and finish everything that was left so this is a big step for me.

Now I'm here putting together this journal and hoping someone will read it and maybe even get inspired by it and want to do what I am trying to do. I'm feeling a little hungry, but it is all about will power. I will not let this beat me. So just to ensure that I don't get anymore urges to eat, I think I'm going to turn in early. I have another busy day tomorrow.

Thanks for reading.